Billie: Greaser at Heart
by TheShadowlessGirl
Summary: I was born on the south side. I was a soc. But I never Belonged. This is the story of how I Found where I belong and how things are rough all ( my first Fanfic) Please read and review! It would really help motivate me to keep writing! And Fave and Follow! Enjoy! Thanks!
1. Finding Home

What if Darry met a girl. After everything. After Dallas. After Johnny. And what if this girl was a soc?

Well this girl I told you about, she ain't me. She's my sister, Sudie. Sudie's tall, endowed, blonde, and blue eyed. None of our native American shows in her. Me on the other hand. Tall, flat, black hair, and black eyes. Even my skin is fairly darker than hers. Oh! and my name's Billie.

My sister was different than any other girl I knew. She used to wear those uncomfortable skirts and sweaters with that annoying little scarf around her neck, but after we moved into the Curtis' house things changed. She started wearing jeans, button downs, and cowboy boots.

She says she and Darry had to only look at each other and they fell in love. We had to stop at the gas station Soda worked at when Darry came in carrying a sheet of roofing. Well let's just say he hasn't gotten over it since. Darry would make up any excuse to pick up Ponyboy from school just so's he could see her.

Then came the days that we would stop over at their house. It was always crowded with members of the gang. Pony and I were on okay terms so I wasn't always bored whenever we went over. Soda was nice to everybody except socs. The gang wasn't to happy about it either. But then Two-bit Matthews said his famous quote.

"The only thing that keeps Darry from being a soc is us."

It was settled from then on.

I remember peeking around the corner to watch their first kiss. Nobody else was in the room. She was sitting on the arm of the couch and Darry was sitting on the couch next to her. They were just talking. Just talking. And then Sudie was suddenly in Darry's lap and he was kissing her.

Not like some wild animal, but soft, gentle kisses. I still remember the way he brushed back her hair from her face. It nearly brought tears to my eyes.

Finally, Darry had the guts to show up at our house. What he found is the exact opposite of how they expected soc life to be.

Ever since Mom died, Dad took to the bottle. When he found out his eighteen year old daughter had been sneaking over to see a grease - well let's just say things did not go over to well. By the time Darry was able to knock down the door, Sudie and I were holding each other in fear as dad held the belt he had been using to whip us. Sudie had taken most of the blows while trying to protect me.

I had seen Darry yell at Ponyboy, I had seen him even wrestle two drunk soc boys to the ground when they tried to jump Sudie and me. But never, ever had I seen Darrel Curtis so enraged. He beat Dad so mercilessly that even after we were packed up and leaving the house he still lay unconscious on the kitchen floor.

Since then we have lived at the Curtis's home. Dad knows not to bother us because he would be thrown in jail for beating us. Unknown to any of the gang, Sudie and I took pictures of our bruises and injuries after every beating we ever received. This time was without a doubt the worst one. Sudie had a busted lip, three broken ribs, a broken clavicle, and welt marks covering every single part of exposed skin she had. Blood was incessantly flowing from my nose,a black eye, and welts across my back and thighs. I also had concussion from when Dad slammed my head against the wall.

The gang patched us up just as well as any doctor could've.

It has been a year since then. Sudie, like Darry, now has full custody of me. Every once in a while, we might run into Dad or meet some of the socs we used to hang out with. They all think we were extremely crazy to ever have moved in with the family that was friends with the boy that killed Bob Sheldon.

We always said the same thing in response, "Well... we would rather be alive and happy as greasers than dead and gone as socs."

One thing is for sure though - we would have been dead if Darry hadn't shown up when he did.

* * *

"Billie! Get your skinny self out of bed!" yelled Soda from down the hall.

"Shut your trap, Soda! You just want somebody to make you your breakfast, because your to lazy to make it yourself!" I yelled back.

"You know it!" he yelled back laughing.

One thing you could say about Soda. He always knew how to brighten up a day or make you laugh or smile.

I tried to crawl out of bed but had a pretty hard time considering the heavy arm that was slung around my waist. I tried shoving the arm off, but it wouldn't budge. I jerkily twisted so that I was staring at the most adorable face in the world.

Ponyboy was breathing evenly with his eyes closed. I reached up and ran my hands through his rarely seen, un-greased hair. I relished these moments with him. Only he had no idea they happened. I was always out of the bed before he ever woke up.

I had fallen in love with Ponyboy that first night we came home to live with them. After Darry had patched us up, I stayed on the couch and probably would have sobbed the whole night if it had not been for Pony. He stayed up with me and held me, telling me how things were going to be alright. He held me until my crying stopped. And when it did, he picked me up bridal-style and carried me to his room where I fell asleep in his arms. Ever since then, I have not been able to fall asleep without him beside me. Not that it is too awkward. Sudie sleeps in the same bed as Darry, but she vows she won't have sex with him until their wedding night. Which is do in six months.

Sudie is going to make one beautiful bride.

"Pony, I need to get up," I whispered. The only thing that came out of Ponyboy was a muffled grunt, but still he lifted his arm just the tiniest bit so that I could slip out of bed. Then a very evil plan came to my mind. I grabbed the corner of the blanket and wrenched off of Pony's body.

My Ponyboy lay on the bed in nothing but his boxer shorts! Ponyboy had become remarkably well toned after he quit smoking and running track.

"Billie! I'm gonna kill you." he muttered while cringing.

"Serves you right for always sleeping in." I countered.

"Oh, really...?" he smiled coyly at me and before I had time to react, he lashed out and grabbed me by my waist and wrestled me to the ground."Uncle!" he shouted.

"Never!" shouted back.

"You will, or I won't let you up."he threatened.

" Pony, I hate to break it to you, but you are just a bit more vulnerable than me." I replied wickedly.

"How so?" he questioned. He looked over my shoulder to gaze into my eyes. By doing so, he released his hold on me just enough that I was able to buck him off.

"I told you 'never'."

I stood up and straightened my pajamas. Ponyboy was still lying on the ground, looking up at me with his hands resting behind his neck. It looked like he might have been admiring me. My heart skipped a beat.

"Billie? Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, what?"

"Do you think you'll get married one day?"

_To you._

"Uhh... Pony, that is kind of a personal question."

"So? Your sister's marrying my brother. Just thought if you were thinking about it, it would be 'round now."

"Gosh! Pony, I'm fifteen years old and living 'round here sometimes means I won't live to see sixteen, Pony. I don't like to plan ahead. Cause once you do, things start going down hill."

"Okay, okay. Don't get dicey. I'll tell you one thing though."

"What?"

"You sure do look pretty when you're mad."

"You're dead Curtis."

I lunged at him, but he was already up and running to the bathroom.

"You two, hurry up! or you're gonna be late for school!" yelled Darry from down the hall.

I walked back into our room and pulled off my shirt, and just as I was putting on my bra on Pony boy walked in. He remained un-phased. We became fairly used to walking in on each other while we were dressing.

"You almost ready..." his voice trailed off as I turned around looking at him.

"What?" I asked defensively.

He shook his head as if he was trying to clear his mind. "Let's go."


	2. Days on EndA Shoulder to Ride On

"Coming, Pony," gosh, I never knew guys could be so annoying.

When I was ready, Ponyboy grabbed my hand and began hauling me out of the house.

"Bye everyone. See you later," I shouted as we walked out the door.

Right on cue, Two-bit's old Plymouth rolled up. He beckoned to us to get in. And we were of to school.

While Two-bit was rambling on about cutting class and getting detention, I watched my Pony. He seemed pretty pissed at me, but I had no idea why. Was it because I had gotten him up kind of meanly? Had I insulted recently. The whole seven minute ride was silent except for Two-bit.

When we got to the school parking lot, Two-bit parked his car in the only handicap space left. Ponyboy was out the car before it even fully stopped.

_What's wrong with him?_

"You are gonna get chewed out by Ms. Sanders if you don't move, you dope," I told our half drunk driver.

"Naw… she don't know whose car this is."

"Uh… Two-bit, I hate to break it to you, but you've got the ugliest car in Tulsa. Who doesn't know it?" and with that I was out the door.

"Oh, and, Billie?"

"What, _Keith_?" I was getting really annoyed now.

"What's wrong with Pony?"

"How should I know? I don't live inside his head!"

I hadn't meant to sound as harsh as I did. But the truth was, it bothered me that I did not know what was wrong.

"Well you sleep with him. So if anybody was to know, it'd be you!" he countered.

"You know what Two-bit?" I asked. He gave me an incredulous glare.

"What?" he yelled at me as I turned and marched towards the building.

"Grow a set!" I shouted back.

Ugh! Boys can be so infuriating. I wake up and everything is fine. I turn around in my room to answer a question and my world goes to pieces. Now not only is Ponyboy mad at me, but Two-bit is too.

* * *

Classes were the same as always. Boring. I already knew Geometry. I had already read and re-read every single work of Shakespeare and Poe. I had already studied the French and Indian War, and the Battle of Bunker Hill.

By the time lunch rolled around, I was Debating whether or not ditching and risking Darry and Sudie reaming me out for it. I walked to my usual table in the corner where I would usually get all of my homework done before school was over. Then plop! Sitting right next to me was Ronald Ivy. The most popular boy in school, the star athlete, and the teenage heartthrob of Tulsa. Oh, and I forgot to mention that he is dumber than dirt.

" What is a pretty girl like you doing sitting by yourself?" he asked. He put his arm around my shoulders.

_Geez, this is going to be fun._

I smiled sweetly at him."I don't know why. But what's a handsome boy like you doing, descending to my lowly table and coming to talk to me?"

"Well, I thought you might like some company. You know? I am an all 'round good guy?" he added, smiling.

_Is he legitamately this dumb to think I was serious._

I knew that he just wanted to add me to the list of names he had of every girl who's cherry he popped. Well he sure as hell wasn't getting mine!

I looked around the cafeteria and saw that every single soc, greaser, and middle class girl was giving me the death stare.

"Well," I said, standing up and shrugging his arm off "go find yourself a broad who actually gives a damn."

"Hold up, Hold up!" he shouted after me when I turned around to walk away. "I believe that when a girl tells a nice guy like me to get lost, she really means yes."

_This guy couldn't take a hint,could he?__! Well now that we have everybody's attention. _

He grabbed my hand and began to lead me back to the table. I willingly followed. He had no idea what I had in store for him. His arm snaked around my waist this time. He began talking about some stupid football scholarship he had received, and his stupid, loud, gas-guzzling mustang. I mean, it went through more gallons of gas than Two-bit could go through beer.

I reached over and grabbed the unfinished chocolate milk I had, had for lunch. I began to rotate it in between my hands.

"Say, how about meeting me tonight for a date. We could go to the Dingo?"

"Oh, sorry. I have plans for tonight. In fact, I have plans for the rest of my life. And guess what Buddy. You're not in any of them." I stood up again. This time with assurance.

"Aw! Don't be like that, Sugar. I told you that whenever a girl says no to me, she really means yes."

"Well, here's one girl who doesn't."

And with that, I poured my chocolate milk right in his lap. His face was in utter shock. I turned around and walked out of there like I owned the place. Because right then and there, I did.

* * *

When I stepped out of the cafeteria, I heard someone calling my name. I turned and saw Two-bit sauntering towards me with a big grin on his face. No doubt he had seen me in there. I smiled at his laughing face.

"You were pretty good back there," he told me. He picked me up and boosted me up so that I was now sitting on his shoulders like a five-year-old. "Hip, hip to the girl who turned down Ronald Ivy!" he shouted, running down the hallway. I am sure we disrupted every single class that was in session.

I laughed to my heart's content. Now that Two-bit and I were now back on good terms I only had to worry about Ponyboy.


	3. Stay Gold My Johnnycake

Chapter Three

After school, we were sitting on the hood of Two-bit's car waiting for Ponyboy for over half an hour, but he never showed.

"Maybe he has track practice." Two-bit said.

"No. he has track every day except Friday." I replied.

"And today's Friday I presume?"

I looked at Two-bit with a smirk. "You might actually be able to tell which day of the week it is, if you weren't always drunk."

"Shoot! It'd ruin my rep if I didn't get drunk!" he scoffed at me.

"You ruin mine just by me hanging out with you."

"Aw, nahh… you are just lucky enough to be stuck with me."

In truth Two-bit was probably me best friend , next to Pony and Sudie anyway. He was always there. Somehow he understood the way things were. Two-bit was to me how booze was to him. Two-bit made me realize that life could be happy, and good, and funny. I was happy when he told me him and Kathy were going steady. She was the only girl that could get him to stop drinking every once in a while. Whenever he would go over to her house he always had to be sober. No booze was ever allowed. She was the one of two blondes I knew who were actually smart. The other blonde being my sister. Two-bit loved that girl. He would do anything for her.

"Well maybe he walked home. He's done it before. I just hope he doesn't get jumped though."

I hated it when he did things like this. Darry was right most of the time when he said Pony didn't think.

"I'm not sure..." I had a strange unsettling feeling in my gut that I always trusted. Like when girls get cramps before their crimson wave.

"Oh, don't get nervous on me now. Plus worryin' won't make it any better, Billie."

I sighed, "You're right. Okay. Let's go home."

* * *

When Two-bit and I got home, we walked inside the house expecting to find Ponyboy. We checked everywhere in the house and down the street. My anxiety began to heighten after I called Sodapop, Darry, and Sudie and nobody knew where he was.

I called the police after phoning everybody.

All of the gang, even Steve, was out looking for Ponyboy. We were speculating that he had been jumped or something and was lying dead in a ditch.

It was two in the morning when we finally gave up and went home. And the only reason for that was was because too many people started yelling at us from their windows, telling us to be quiet.

When we did get home I went to our room and curled up in a ball on our bed. I rocked back and forth methodically. My breath came in shallow pants. I dry sobbed.

You know how people say that there is no such thing as a single tear, well I just proved them wrong. The whole time that I sat there in my numb state, only one single tear fell from my eye. Just one. Just one single was all I had. That was all I had to mourn my first and only love. Maybe that was the greatest show of grief you could ever show. maybe your body knew that it would break if you shed anymore tear. Maybe your heart knew it would shatter or shrivel up and wither away it is shed anymore tears.

I rolled over on my side and rested my head on our pillow. For some reason it wasn't comfortable. I reached inside the pillow case and pulled out a piece of paper. On it was Ponyboy's hurried scrawl.

**Billie, I'm sorry if I have all of you scared, so I am hoping you find this letter before you all start freaking out. I just needed to get out. Just seeing Y_ou_** **there! Man, you just looked to much like _Him_!You with your dark skin and hair. Then you had that face! You looked like a lost puppy that had been kicked too many times. I know you must think I'm crazy. It just hurt too damn much! I'm not mad at you at all, and I know you must think I am. I wish I could be there to explain. Don't worry about me. I will be back soon. Tell the gang for me, okay? Soda is probably taking it harder than anybody else. Other than you of course. I love you, Stay Gold My Johnnycake. Sorry. Be back soon. Ponyboy Curtis**

While I was sitting there, I began to think. _Why? Why would he call me his Johnnycake?__ Where would Pony go if he ever wanted to get away? Where?! Where...?! _Then it hit me!

Once a long time ago Ponyboy told me just part of the story of him, Johnny, and Dallas.

* * *

We were sittting in the vacant lot ,"Well it all started when me and Johnny went to see a movie at the drive-in with Dally. And we had these two pretty soc girls were sitting in front of were Cherry and Marcia. You know 'em. They're seniors at school. Dal' started talking pretty dirty to Cherry and she got pretty fed up with him and started yelling back at him. Then Johnny told dally to cut it out and Dally just got up and left. I'd never seen Johnny stand up to anybody, let alone his idol. Anyways, the girls asked us to sit up with them so's we could protect them. Two-bi showed up then. When the movie was over, the three of us decided we were gonna walk the girls home. while we were though the girl's boyfriends - turns out they had gone to the movies with them, but when they found out they had brought booze the girls left. We almost had a fight then and there. Cherry was able to call it off though."

Johnny's folks were fightin' so we came here. He went all crazy and started talking about killing himself and 'bout how he wanted to go to a place where there were no greasers or socs. I told him the country was a good place to go. We fell asleep. I later on woke up and knew I was real late. Well' when I got home, Darry 'n Soda were both waitin' up for me. Darry got so mad at me that he hit me. He'd never done that before. It made me so mad I ran out the house. I ran and got Johnny and told him we were running away. But good ole' Johnny was able to talk me out of it. We walked to the park when all of a sudden some mustang pulled up. It was the girl's boyfriends and they had brought reinforcements. The jumped us. They were gonna drown me, but Johnny killed one of them with his switchblade. We didn't know what else to do so we went to Buck's and found Dallas. He said, 'Take the 3:15 train to Windrixville. There's an old abandoned church on top of Jay Mountain.' He gave us a heater and some more instructions. Then we ran." he breathed. "We both fell asleep immediately. When I woke up Johnny was gone. He had went to get some enough supplies to last a week." Ponyboy chuckled. "He got me _Gone With the Wind _so we could pass time_. _He even got some peroxide so we could dye my air. That's why when you met me I looked a lot more like Soda than I do now. The next morning we watched the sun rise and I told him about that poem by Robert Frost. 'Nothing Gold can Stay'."

We were gone for a week when Dally came up to see us. He took us out to eat, and that's when Johnny told him we were gonna turn ourselves in. When we got to the church, it was on fire. There were a bunch of kids and some adults there too. They were screaming 'bout how some of the kids were missing. Johnny and I didn't waste any time. We ran into the church and got the kids out. Dally even came to help us get them out through the window. Johnny wasn't so lucky. A beam fell and broke his spine and he got burnt real bad. If dally hadn't of been there he would've burned to death for sure."

When they got us back to town, all of us were put in the hospital. I was fine and I got to go home with Darry and Soda. THey even wrote a story about us in the paper named 'Juvenile Delinquents Turn Heroes'. Can you believe it? Well, it turns out the soc Johnny killed had a lot of friends. There was gonna be a rumble. Two-bit and I visited him and Dally the next day. Johnny wanted me to get the _book_. He passed out cold when we left. When we visited Dally he was saying how we had to stomp the socs at the rumble for Johnny."

When Two-bit and I came home, everybody was getting ready for the rumble. At the rumble I got beat up real bad. Somehow, Dally was able to get out the hospital and was there. When we beat the socs, Dallas grabbed me and took me to see johnny. We got there just in time too, 'cause Johnny was almost gone. He told us how the rumble didn't change anything and greasers will always greasers and socs will always be socs. It was no use. TH last words he said were to me. he said, 'Stay gold, Ponyboy. Stay gold.' and then he died. Dally lost it. The only thing Dally ever really cared about in this world was Johnny. He went and robbed a store. I went home and told everybody Johnny was dead. Dally phoned and told us what had happened and we had to hide him. We were all running to the park to meet him when the fuzz showed. We tried to stop it but Dally drew his unloaded heater." He paused again. I sat there motionless. Just letting him breathe.

"Dally. They shot Dally. There still was a trial on whether or not I should have been allowed to stay with Darry. You know how that turned out. And then you and your sister showed up. I guess ya'll were filling in the empty spaces in the gang."

"And we have been here ever since," I finished for him

"Yep. And we are all lucky to have you."

* * *

I knew where he was.


	4. A midnight call on Steve Randle

**Hello my Peeps! This is my first author's note. Can you guess where Ponyboy is? Just wanted to say that this is not an ordinary Mary-Sue romance story. Trust me. I know this because I hate those. Just bear with me. The story in my mind seems to have a different twist than any other story I've read on FF. Well here goes chapter four.**

* * *

I silently packed my bags. It was the middle of the night. I had to get to the train. I had so many thing I had to do.

I debated with myself on whether or not leaving a note. But if I did that they would definitely come and get us. Then an idea popped into my head. I sneaked out of my room with my bag over my shoulder. Just as i was about to open the door a voice that came from the couch.

"Where do you think your going at this time of night?"

I swear I jumped about of my skin. "Gahhh! Two-Bit! What the _Hell _are you doing on the couch?! You almost gave me a heart attack!"

"Well I could ask you the same thing. What are you doing, sneaking out the house at this hour?"

"Nowhere!" I said, a little too quickly.

"Ah... I see. Little Miss Perfect is sneaking out to meet somebody."

I decided this would be a good alibi. Two-bit wouldn't tell on me as long as it was too funny and he could hold it over my head in order to get something in return.

"Oh, shut up , Two-bit. The only reason your here is because you were too drunk again and your mom wouldn't let you in the house." I whispered harshly. I knew this was hitting him below the belt, but Two-bit needed to know I was serious.

He smirked Darry and Sudie would be so happy to..."

I rushed towards him and bent down on my knees in front of where I believed his face would be.

"Two-bit. Please don't. They'd kill me!"

"Well. I think I should get something in return."

"Like what?"

"Hmmm... let's see. How about the name of the guy your going to see?"

I was shocked. That's all he wanted? Then it struck me. The worse the person I was going to see, the less information Two-bit would want.

_Gosh! Billie! Think Think! Who is the worst guy on the North Side?!_

"Tim. Er... Tim Shepards."

The most disbelieving look flashed across his face.

"Tim? Tim Shepard?! You mean the Tim Shepards? You Tim's new girl? Ha! Hell, even I never saw that coming. Haha, but Ole' Tim always did like himself a virgin."

"What makes you think I'm a virgin?" I retaliated, even though I was.

"Ha! He got in your panties already, huh?" he sneered.

I felt so degraded. Of course I was still a virgin. I was a Christian. I wasn't gonna lose it 'til my wedding night. Sudie taught me that if he was going to get it, he had to put a ring on it. But I always imagined that the only man who was going to get it would be Ponyboy. I mean, he was the only guy I ever wanted to see me in that way.

But I still would rather. Darry and Sudie to ream me out for sneaking over to the Shepard's home than me sneaking out to find Ponyboy three towns over.

"Two-bit, seriously, please don't tell Darry and Sudie. Not even Soda. If they found out, Dar and Soda would both beat him something awful!"

"Okay. I won't."

"What?" Two-bit never let anybody off easy.

''Well, I sure as hell would rather get in trouble with Darry than with Tim."

"Oh... Thanks then."

I walked out the door. The moment my sneakers hit the street I began to sprint for the my Steve's house. I needed at least one serious person to cover for me. I ran as if my life depended it. But little did I know that soon my life _would_ depend on it.

* * *

Steve's front yard was a complete mess. Overturned lawn chairs, empty beer bottles, cigarette buts, and all other sorts of miscellaneous items were scattered over the lawn.

I quietly made my way to his bedroom window and began knocking on the glass.

"Steve? You awake?" I whispered?

No answer. So I tried again.

"Steve?!" this time I said it louder.

Still no answer. I tried the window to see if it was unlocked, and what do you know? It was.

I stealthily crawled through and much to my surprise I was on my hands and knees directly on top of Steve. Each of my hands was placed on either side of his head and my knees were straddling his hips.

His eyes snapped open and he looked at me in utter shock. But then the slight glimmer of mischievousness flashed back into his eyes once he realized what had happened.

"Well, Billie. I always knew you were fond of me, but I never thought you were the type of girl to surprise me in my own bed," he chuckled.

"Oh! Shut it, Steve! You know I'm not like that!" I retorted, slapping his arm in the process.

Both of his hands rose and gripped my waist.

"Well, what if I want you to be that way?" he added with a wink.

I couldn't help but laugh at him.

"Steve, I told Two-bit I was sneaking out to meet Tim Shepards and..."

"Wait, wait, wait. Hold up? You told _Two-bit_ you were sneaking out to meet Tim? Well, he is definitely going to tell Darry..."

"I know. That's why I told him that. But I need you to tell him where I am _really_ going. Savvy?"

"Oh...! Okay. Uh... So where are you going?"

"If I tell you, will you promise me you won't come?"

"You know where Pony is."

"I know where- Oh."

"Billie, it's not that hard to guess what you are talking about. Once Darry and Sudie wake up and realize you're not there, they are going to know immediately that you went to find Pony."

"But I told Two-bit..."

"That doesn't matter, Billie! I mean, sure, it will buy you some time, but not enough to get him back."

I looked at Steve with resolve. "I'm still going. And you can't stop me."

He cocked an eyebrow at me.

"Oh, really?"

Without any warning, Steve had me pinned underneath him. His elbows were on either side of my head and his legs were lolling about on top of mine.

"Now what are you gonna do?" he quipped.

I looked down at his body. I knew boys usually slept shirtless, but Steve was lying on top of me in only his disrupted bed sheets! The only thing covering his rear end was the thin fabric!

_**"Steve**_**. Randle. If. You. Don't. Get. Off. Of. Me. This. Instant. I. Will. Gladly. Send. You. Straight. Hell. In. A. Hand-basket!"**

"Oh, shi-!"

Steve rolled off of me as quickly as possible and ran for the door of his closet to find a pair of jeans.

I on the other hand stared out the window. Fuming.

"Gee. I'm sorry, Billie,"Steve came over and sat next to me on his bed. "I guess I just kinda lost it."

I looked at him in disbelief. "Kinda? Just kinda lost it? What the hell are you doing letting me stay there like that?!"

"Look, Billie. I'm sorry. It's just that... that... me and Evie had a fight alright, and I'm kind of distracted, okay?"

"Steve, It's just a fight. You two will probably be together again tomorrow morning," I retorted with as much malice I had left in me.

"It's not just that! She... she... she broke up with me," he ended his sentence in a rush.

"What?! Oh, man I'm sorry. I- I- I didn't know."

"Yea, well, it only happened tonight."

We sat in silence. I am not one much for comfort, but I knew Steve needed some. He loved that girl. He didn't need me asking him why or how it happened; so I just put my arms around him and held him.

Pretty soon his shoulders were silently shaking.

"Hey, hey, hey. Look at me," I said, I shifted my hands so that I was holding his head in my hands. "She doesn't deserve you, okay? You are going to be alright."

He stared at me with such intensity that I almost thought he believed me.

He flashed one of those rare smiles and whispered ever so quietly, "Thanks, Billie. But if anybody ever finds out I cried on your shoulder I'll skin you alive."

"Noted."

We laughed in silence.

We sat in silence again. Me with my hands in my lap and him leaning on his hands while they were resting behind him.

"Well, I best be off," I said, standing.

"Uh.. yea, I guess so," he responded.

We both stood. He opened his arms and embraced me.

"You, be safe. And bring Ponyboy home. It's gonna be hell to pay once Soda realizes the both of you are missing."

"Haha. Yea."

We separated, but not completely. My arms were still wrapped around his neck, fingers knotted in his hair. One of his arms was wrapped around my waist while his other hand was cupped around my neck. My fingers must have had a mind of their own, because they slowly began to massage his scalp.

We stared at each other for a moment, and then Steve's eyes began to flicker to my mouth. Very slowly, he pulled me towards him. His head tilted to the left and I tilted mine too.

I brought one of my hands from behind his neck and began stroke his cheek.

Our lips were so close. So tantalizingly close. But then my mind began to work again.

_This isn't right! This is _Steve!

I stepped back abruptly. "I- I- uhmm- I just can't."

I leaned forward again only to plant a swift kiss on his cheek.

"Remember what you promised me," I added. His face was one of complete shock.

I knew that from now on things would be awkward between me and Steve.

"Be back in two or three days. Bye."

I slipped out of the window and entered into the world of the night.


	5. Found you

**_Disclaimer: I don't own The Outsiders. _**

**_Only my OC's. Please R&R._**

**_ With love, _**

**_The Shadowless Girl._**

* * *

When I got to the train, The guard had already checked the car.

What had happened with Steve? Steve and I weren't exactly best friends but we got along okay. Better than he and Pony anyway. But I have never, ever had I thought of Steve in a romantic way. We mainly talked because I had an interest in cars, and ever so often, I would walk over to the DX station to hang out and Steve was the only one working there. We'd talk about unimportant things. Like school, cars, movies, books. But sometimes we talked about the most amazing stuff like life, family, kids, marriage. He told me stuff that he never even told Soda.

* * *

"Man sometimes I think I will never get out of this no good, God-forsaken town!" he ranted.

"I think... if you really wanted to, that is, you could," I replied coolly.

It was a slow day at the DX. Steve and I were sitting across from each other on the front counter. One of his legs was stretched straight while his elbow rested on his other knee. A lit cigarette was slowly burning away in between his fingers. I sat on the opposite end sitting cross-legged with my head against the wall. We were rolling a red bouncy ball back and forth to each other.

"Nahh... I won't get out of here. You and Ponyboy though," he paused to take a long drag from his smoke "you and him. Ya'll could make it." He leaned forward, stretching out his hand to hand me the cancer stick. I took it from him.

I had always wondered how Pony could stand to smoke. He even inhaled! But one day I got tired of wondering. The first time I choked so bad I began to throw up. But then I decided I wouldn't try inhaling anymore. I just sat there with the smoke swirling around in my mouth, enjoying the flavor.

Steve and Two-bit were the only ones in the gang who knew I smoked. And they were the only ones I'd ever smoke around. Sudie would kill me if she ever found out.

"I ain't nothing special," I replied letting the smoke slowly float from my mouth. I handed the cigarette back to him.

"Yea, you are. You make even better grades than Pony did while he was your age. And definitely a hell of a lot better than me."

"So? Doesn't mean I can get anywhere. There are plenty of kids who make good grades."

"Ha! There sure as hell none of those kids around here," he scoffed.

I couldn't help but laugh. Sure I made good grades. It wasn't really that hard. All you had to do was pay attention and do your homework. Plus I liked to read. Even more than Pony. But that was because I had nothing else to do.

"Steve?"

"Yea, Billie."

"You could do it. I know you could. I can see you now working with some big time car company. Or even being a car engineer. Working for on of those major race car companies. I could even see you being a real horse trainer. Really, Steve. I could see you making something of yourself."

He just sat there. And then, that rare genuine smile slowly spread across his face. "You really think so, kid?"

"I know so, Stevie," I winked at him. We just sat there rolling the ball back and forth in our own world, wrapped in a bubble of comfortable silence.

Then he shook his head. "I gotta stop dreamin'. I ain't ever gonna make it out of this town. I'll probably just end up a drunk just like my dad." The normal look of malice and coldness returned to his eyes.

"Don't you ever let me hear those words come out of your mouth again!" I ordered. "You ain't nothing like your dad. You're the exact opposite. You hear me?" My voice had risen as I had yelled at him.

Silence.

All he did was sit there staring at the floor.

"Steve. You dig?"

After a long pause, he looked back up at me and answered, "I dig."

We sat again, for a while, in silence. He now had his eyes closed. I had a question but was afraid to ask.

"Steve. How come you get along with me so well?"

"I don't know."

"Yea you do. Come on. Why?"

"Geez. I had forgotten you were a girl." He sat up. "Man, I don't know. Maybe it's 'cause your quiet. You listen. Not always out to give me a lecture. Not always cracking jokes. You just seem fine listening. And I know you won't tell. You're Johnny. I don't mean you are his replacement. I mean you just remind everybody of him so much. Even physically. But you definitely are a lot tougher than he was. He just grew up too fast, too unloved. You grew up that way too. But nobody had it as bad as Johnny. So, I guess you are the gangs second chance at giving him the love he needed _and _deserved." He sighed. I thought he was over, but he continued, "Plus you the whole gang's little sister. The gang's baby in a sense."

I sat there speechless. That was the kindest thing anybody had ever said to me. I didn't mind people calling me a baby. Because that is what I was. I knew I still had plenty of growing to do, even if I had grown up too fast already.

* * *

I was so tired though, I rested the whole ride there. I was awoken by a sudden jolt. I sat up and looked outside. There was a sign that said "Now Entering Windrixville".

I stood up and walked over to the open door of the train car. Wind was whipping my hair around my face.

_This is going to hurt._

I bent my knees and launched myself out the train door and into the air. I had planned to make a running landing, but based on of my luck. I landed on my side shoulder first.

I tiredly made my way up the mountain. My mind was fully awake because I slept on the train, but I my body was completely bushed after the long walk to the church.

Then I saw it. The burnt remnants of the church. A few pews, beams, a piece of the roof, and the pulpit still remained. Everything was black.

I was slowly tiptoeing my way through the ruins when I came across a pair of sneakers. I moved over and saw my Ponyboy lying face down in the dirt with only a flimsy blanket covering him. He looked so peaceful. So young.

_So this is the place where the heroes hid._

I walked over to where his head lay and sat down. I slowly cradled his head in both my arms setting it into my lap.

_Now i can rest, _I thought. _Now, I can rest. Now that he is safe with me. _

I closed my eyes and let the sweet comfort of having him with me lead me into sleep.


	6. Going Home

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Outsiders. Only my OCs. The rest belongs to S.E. Hinton**

**So Sorry about the wait. **

**I got writer's block and I got seriously Sick.**

** Okay! **

**Enjoy! **

**Oh! Annnnnnnnnddddddddddddddd!**

**R&R Please!**

* * *

The faintest hints of sunlight coming through the trees woke me up from my slumber. My eyelids slowly fluttered open. I looked down to find my lap empty. I stood up and began making my way through the burnt and fallen pieces of wood when I tripped over on of the beams. The ground seemed as if it wanted to greet me. It suddenly began whooshing towards my face. But, thankfully, right before my forehead could collide with the cement base of the church, a pair of strong arms materialized and caught me by the waist.

"Gotcha!" He Exclaimed. He then rotated me so that I was facing him and enveloped me in a bear hug. "How'd you know I was here?" he whispered into my ear.

I was grasping just as tightly back. "It wasn't too hard to figure it out, Pony." I pulled back with my hands resting on his shoulders, "And what were you thinking running away like that?"

"I'm sorry." he muttered stepping back and running his hand through his hair then rubbing the back of his neck. "You just reminded me of things that happened."

I stepped forward and gave him a soft punch in the gut. "I know, Pone. Sometimes you just gotta think past that, and I'm sorry for being such a reminder of Johnny."

"That ain't your fault. Anyways, I shouldn't have left. But, Billie, why'd you come her? Now Darry and Sudie are going to tan both of our hides."

"About that..."

"What?!" he asked urgently.

"I kinda made up and alibi... It should be good for a day or two."

"And what might that alibi be?"

"Well, while I was sneaking out the house, Two-bit caught me. So I told him I was sneaking out to meet Tim Shepards..."

"Wait! Hold up! You told him you were meeting Tim?!"

"Let me finish. Well after Two-bit swallowed that, I sneaked over to Steve's and I told him what I was doing. He promised that in a couple of days or so that he would tell them the truth."

Ponyboy just stared at me in silence. Then suddenly he began running around gathering all of his belongings and supplies. He grabbed my bag and shoved it into my hands.

"What?! Pony, what the hell are you doing?!"

"Dammit, Billie! I can't let you get in trouble because of me. We're going home, alright." he shouted at me.

I looked at him in astonishment. "Pony! I told you! I'm good for a couple'a days."

"No you aren't. Not on my watch. I'm getting you home."

"Why?!"

"Because! If you don't show up soon, they are just gonna be super pissed. And if they believe what you told Two-bit then that is gonna push them completely over the edge."

By now he was marching down the slope towards the main road. I remained planted where I was at the top of the mountain.

"Well then," my voice dripping with sarcasm "how are we going to get home?"

"There's a noon train due back for Tulsa today," he spat over his shoulder.

I glanced back at the the remnants of the church. I turned back and began jogging down the hill.

_Well there goes my little adventure._ I thought.

"Hey! Ponyboy! Wait up!"

* * *

We had just arrived back in Tulsa and were walking back home. We were about a mile from the house. We hadn't talked the whole train ride home. We just sat there looking stupid. Or, I guess, feeling stupid.

Finally I decided to break the silence.

"Pony? Do you really see me as Johnny? Or... I mean... Do you think of me as just as a little sister?"

"No, Billie."

"No what?"

"No you're not just some little sister."

"Well then, What am I?"

Ponyboy stopped walking and turned so that he was facing me. I did the same. Then with calculated steps, he began to approach me.

The look on his face was strange, though. His eyes had turned more gray than the usual green they were, and a dent formed in between his eyebrows That only formed when he was thinking really hard about doing something.

Because of this, with each step that he took forward; I took a step backwards until me back collided with a brick wall. And still, he approached. He then placed either hand on either side of my head.

But what he did next is what surprised me the most.

He slowly leaned forward very slowly. Placing his lips against my ear.

"Billie. You're not just a sister. You're even more than a Johnny." He drew back his face from mine and stared me straight in the eye. "You are the girl I've fallen in love with."

Tears began to form in my eyes. He did love me. After all this time of waiting for him, he finally came out and said what I had dreamed him saying for the last year. I never thought it would come true.

I reached up with my hand and smoothed out the dent in between his eyebrows. "Well then..." I said, my voice trailing. My fingers trailed over his eyebrows and to the back of his head. My hand knotted itself in his hair while the other curled around his bicep.

His own hand clasped the back of my neck with an inescapable hold as his other arm formed an iron bar around my waist.

I closed my eyes as our faces came closer and closer together. Then it happened. Our lips touched.

At first it was soft. Just our lips. He surprised me when his tongue lightly traced the outline of my lips. Warmth coursed through me, all the way from my toes to the tip of my nose. I smiled into the kiss and drew his body closer to mine so that my chest was against his.

All I could think was_ "I could do this forever."_

Then our moment was ended by the loud roar of a mustang pulling up along side of us. We pulled apart as quickly as possible and began walking briskly in the direction towards home.

"What do we have here?!" The driver shouted.

Four or five drunk socs pooled out of the car and began to jeer at us.

"Keep your head down," Pony ordered.

I obeyed.

Two of the socs ran ahead of us to cut us off.

"What's this? A grease finally getting himself some action?" the leader joked.

I couldn't help it. I had to look to see who they were. I was shocked and saddened by who I saw.

There in front of me stood a drunk and completely disorderly Ronald Ivy.

I just prayed he didn't recognize me. My prayers were not answered.

"Well, well, well... if it ain't the tramp that poured that milk in my lap," he sneered. "You're gonna pay for that," he added, winking at me.

"You. Will. Not. Touch. Her." Ponyboy warned him in a low voice. "You better watch it. You're in our territory."

"Oh? Really? I don't see anybody around."

And he was right. The sun was falling behind the trees and night was approaching. We were going to have to go this alone.

Then Ronald gave a small motion towards us with his chin. The socs were on us faster than a pack of wild dogs on a Christmas dinner.

The whole time I had stood there silently cowering behind Pony had done me no good. I was now kicking and screaming with all my might. Even biting down on an arm or leg whenever one was available.

Ponyboy wasn't doing much better. They had slugged a great many times in the face and the gut, but he was still putting up a great fight.

Pretty soon though, there was no more fight left in us. They had dragged us into a nearby alley. Ponyboy was gagged with a hanker chief while two others were holding me with my face against the wall. They suddenly flipped me around so that I was looking at Ronald pull out a switchblade. He glared at Pony like a predator stalked his prey. Then he took Pony's chin in one hand and began inspecting it. Like a butcher would for the best place to cut.

Ponyboy simply stood there and stared him down. It was at times like these when Pony resembled Darry the most.

He raised the blade right to Ponyboy's jugular and began to create a cut when I screamed.

"No! Please! God! NO!" Tears were forming again in my eyes, but now they were tears of fear not joy.

"Shut her up," Ronald ordered.

"I'll do anything! Please just... Don't hurt him!" My voice had risen a few octaves in hysteria.

At this, Ronald paused. "Anything?" he asked.

"Yes. Just don't hurt him," I breathed.

I knew what he was going to do. I knew they would make Pony watch too. But it was worth all the pain if it meant Ponyboy would be okay.

He looked at each member of his little group and gave me a sardonic grin."You heard her boys. Anything."

At this the two boys holding me against the wall now had me pinned to the ground while Ronald began working with the buckle on his belt.

I glanced at Pony and saw him trying to fight off the soc that was holding him and trying to scream at me. His eyes met mine and he began to shake his head violently. Pleading with me. I simply stared back with sorrow.

Ronald climbed on top of me and began to fumble with the buttons on my jeans.

I couldn't help it. Just because I had said I would do anything to save my Pony, it did not mean I wouldn't be putting up a fight. I screamed and began to pummel anything my arms and fist could come in contact with.

"Gag her!" Ronald ordered again.

They did so. But they didn't stop there. They began to slug me until I was almost unconscious. The last things I remember was the pain of having my virginity stripped away from me and the pained expression on Ponyboy's face as he and I both tried to deny what was happening to me.

* * *

**It broke my heart to write this chapter. It was literally painful. I hope you are liking the story though. Please R&R and any suggestions for my story just PM me.**


	7. Author's Note!

**Hey my lovelies! I am SO, SO, SO, SO, SO SORRY for not updating last weekend. **

**I wrote the whole new chapter, and when I went to upload it, my computer crashed! **

**Therefore, deleting my whole chapter! **

**So, now I have to rewrite a whole new chapter!**

**:'(**

**I am so Sorry! **

**Please forgive me.**

**I will have the new chapter up for you this weekend!**

**I promise!**

**And please, if you have any ideas, PM me.**

**R & R!**

**Fave & Follow!**

**Thanks!**

**You's all my gang!**

**The Shadowless Girl**


	8. Safe Home

**Okay ppl! **

**after this chapter, I will not be writing another chapter until I get 25 reviews.**

**Haha! **

**The art of blackmail!**

**Please help me.**

**It really helps motivate me. **

**Thanks!**

* * *

The gentle swaying that made me wince at every step as a jolt of pain that went through my body. My eyelids were felt as if they were lead weights. Fighting underneath an ocean. Wave after wave forcing me deeper and deeper into the darkness.

But, at the same time, it seemed as if my body and soul were separated from each other. I was floating in the air, looking down at a boy carrying a girl in his arms. she was unconscious, her arms hanging limply at her sides and her head lolling back over his arm. Her jeans had a large blood stain on the inside of her thigh and her shirt had been ripped open, but crudely buttoned. The girls face was bruised and cut with blood trailing down from her lip and eyebrow.

I couldn't place the face of the girl, but the boy's face was vaguely familiar. I tried to remember his name, but I couldn't find it.

The boy was beaten too. Worse than the girl. His face and throat were cut and bruised, his shirt was torn and slashes flowing with blood were littered all over his arms. And somehow he still had the strength to carry the girl, even though his arms and legs were shaking.

He was staring at the girl adoringly, yet his eyes were set with a strong sort of stone cold anger and determination. When I took a closer look at the boy's eyes, I saw that he was crying and speaking to the girl.

Then a single tear fell from his cheek and landed on the girl's face. Right when the tear landed, I felt moisture on my own face.

Then all of a sudden my body was calling my soul back. With this I heard the boy's soft and muffled voice'

"Please! Billie! Wake up!Come on! You've got to wake up...! Please!" the voice cried to me.

I tried to wake up, but the weight was holding me down. I tried to quiet the boy, to calm him, by answering him. But I couldn't.

He called out to me again, "Please! Billie! I'm begging you! Wake Up! You have to wake up!"

Somehow the tear and the voice gave me the strength and resilience to wake up. My eyes fluttered open and i remembered the boy carrying me.

"Ponyboy...?" I croaked.

"Billie?!" he cried. "Thank God your're awake!"

I reached up to to touch his face. "They hurt you."

"Forget about me," he ordered.

"They promised..."

"What did you expect, Billie?" he almost shouted at me, shaking me slightly.

I winced. I again felt the faintness begin to push me back under.

"I'm sorry..." He looked down at me. "Are you okay?"

But by that time, I was too far gone.

* * *

Ponyboy stared down at her.

How could they have done this to her? How? She had never done anything to them. She never deserved anything like that! They had to ruin our moment! Ours!

She had been so soft. So quiet and sensitive during the kiss. Then they show up and RAPE her! Ronald had bragged that she was a virgin while he was using her.

Ponyboy's only consolation was that she was unconscious while it was happening to her.

But that wasn't the worst part of it. The worst part was that she had sacrificed herself to save him. To keep him safe.

He turned the corner and the house came into view. It was then when he started to run for the house. He opened the door to the house.

The whole gang was there. Darry was standing behind the chair massaging Sudie's shoulders while she had her head resting in her hands. Soda was sitting on the couch, wringing his hands together, with his elbows resting on his knees. Steve was sitting in the door frame of the kitchen. Two-bit was pacing back and forth.

When he walked in with her in his arms, they all turned and froze. Sudie was the first one up and grabbed Billie.

"What happened, Pony?!" She shouted.

"We got jumped."

"Lay her on the couch,'' Darry ordered.

When he did, Sudie drew in a harsh gasp.

"Pony, Why is there blood ...down her... her thighs?" she whispered.

"Go call the fuzz now!" yelled Soda.

"What happened to y'all?"

"Billie!"

"Where were you two?"

"Billie wake up!"

Everybody was yelling at the same time. Then a soft, quiet voice whimpered from the body lying on the couch, quieting everyone.

"Billie?" Sudie crouched in front of her brushing her hair out of her face.

"It hurts..." she moaned.

* * *

"It hurts," I moaned.

"I know, Baby." Sudie said stroking my cheek. "What hurts? What do you need, Boo?"

By then, I fell unconscious again.

* * *

"Get her in the bath tub." Sudie ordered.

Two-bit pushed through the group and looped an arm under her knees and under her shoulders. He stood and turned.

"I'm going to take care of her. Okay?" he asked. Mainly looking at Sudie.

Sudie simply nodded and Two-bit disappeared around into the bathroom.

* * *

I was awoken by someone laying me in hot water. I was fairly shocked to see that it was Two-bit.

"Two-bit? What are you doing?"

He smiled. "Just gonna get you cleaned up."

Two-bit gently grabbed my arm and began to rub it with a soapy cloth.

I cowered slightly. I felt disgusting. Dirty. Maybe I wasn't, but still felt that way. I was glad it was Two-bit was the one washing me.

We remained uncharacteristically silent the rest of the time he washed me. Two-bit did not even blush when he started to wipe the blood from my thighs.

He gently dried me off.

"Billie, I want you to know something." he said. He turned me to face him. "You did nothing wrong. You understand? You dig?"

I looked away from him and stared at my feet. "I know," I whispered.

He leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on my forehead. He guided me to my room.

My walking was a bit stiff because my legs, abs, and arms were sore.

Two-bit helped me get into a pair of pajamas.

"Okay, Billie. I want you to stay in here and rest."

"Please don't leave me, Two-bit." I whispered. "I can't let anyone else see me like this.'' Tears brimmed in my eyes.

Two-bit grabbed my shoulders and pressed his forehead to mine. "I'll be right back okay? Look, we just got to figure out what we are going to do."

"Like what?"

"Well if we are going to call the cops or..."

"No! You can't call police!"

"Billie. I know you don't want people to know what happened, but we gotta go to the fuzz."

My lower lip wobbled.

"Billie, you are gonna be just fine. Your'e here with the gang, and if anybody tries to come near you again, we will stomp the shit out of them!" he added with a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.

Two-bit helped me into bed and when he turned to leave, I called out to him.

"Two-bit."

"Yea."

"Can you send Ponyboy in here please?"

"Sure thing, Kid."

While sitting there I thought of all that had happened today. My thoughts were happy until after our kiss , and then my mind completely shut off. Then Pony walked in.

When he did, I was lying on my side looking out the window. Ponyboy lightly lifted the covers to our bed and crawled in next to me. He wrapped both arms around my waist. I reached down to grab one of his hands and hold it in between both of mine. I pressed his balled up hand against my my lips. I kissed each of his knuckles, then splayed his fingers out individually and kissed the tip of each finger, then I planted a kiss on his palm.

"None of this was your fault." I whispered.

"No, no, no. None of it is your fault. It is my fault." he whispered back.

"No, Pony. It's not."

"If I hadn't ran away in the first place..."

"Don't you dare say that again. It was neither of us. You dig?"

"Yea, I dig."

I couldn't see his facial expression, but I hoped he was smiling. Then a pair of lips presses lightly against the back of my neck. They started at the back then his lips slowly ventured to the side, then to the hollow underneath my ear. Ponyboy placed a hand my shoulder causing me to roll onto my back and his lips started brush underneath my jaw.

He slowly drew his face away from mine.

"Is this okay?" he questioned.

I nodded. Maybe I would find out that even though I had just had a very bad experience, I could still accept physical contact.

Ponyboy raised himself up on one arm and threw his leg over me. Now he was on top of me on his hands and knees. He lowered his lips to my jaw again. At the same time, He brought both of his hands down to my waist and his fingertips ghosted the skin under the hem of my shirt.

My own hands ,which had been knotted in his hair, silently slid down to his waist. They began to venture underneath his his shirt. My hands explored the smooth planes of his chest and his abdominal muscles. My hands moved back down to the hem of his shirt. Using my thumbs, I hesitantly began to lift it.

Ponyboy sat up as I helped him remove his shirt. His lips pressed to mine again. Both of his hands snaked their under my shirt. His fingertips skimmed the surface of my bare ribs leaving my skin on fire. Then very gently, with a slight rocking motion, Ponyboy rolled so that I was now on top of him. He let his hands trail a little bit higher underneath my shirt, but when the reached the base of my bra we both froze.

I pulled back ever so slightly with my forehead against his. I breathed deeply and slowly. Reminding myself that this was Ponyboy.

Ponyboy lay perfectly still under me. Hands still under my shirt and holding me. Very gingerly, he lowered his hands back to my waist.

He then gave me and slight goofy grin that I couldn't help but smile back at.

I slowly relaxed and pressed my lips back to his. As he had done during our first kiss, Ponyboy traced my lips with his tongue. I stiffened a little when it traced where my lips parted. I hesitantly opened my mouth and allowed him entry. A low guttural groan reverberated from his chest.

Ponyboy's arms began to encircle my waist. He stopped at my spine and began to trace a slow line up my back making me shiver. When they reached the base of my neck, He stopped and trailed them back down.

A soft sigh of delight escaped from my lips.

Silently, Ponyboy took one hand out from under my shirt and slid up to my jaw. With his fingers behind my neck and his thumb against my chin, he pushed my face upward and kissed his way down under my jaw.

I had never felt this way before. It was like electricity would zap me every place he touched me, and my only thought and whole concentration was focused on him. And him on me.

Ponyboy's lips began to explore the column of my throat with soft feathery kisses.

My own hands wrapped themselves around the back of my neck pulling him ever so closer.

When his mouth returned to mine, they had a new hunger, a stronger thirst, more ardor. The kiss was deep, passionate, and long.

Ponyboy's hands again slid down my body. His fingers trailed down my waist, where his left hand stopped. His other hand continued to slide down over my hip, down my thigh. He stopped at the crease where my calf and thigh joined. His hand circled around my thigh and tugged it closer to his hip.

Even though I enjoyed the feeling, The feeling of being desired, the face of my attackers flashed in my mind. Panic erupted in my stomach. I involuntarily pulled my face away from his.

My breath was coming in short, harsh pants, while he drew his in strong and deep.

"Pony?" I whispered. "This... this is... is..."

"This is as far as you wanna go?" He asked.

I nodded again.

He nodded with me.

Ponyboy rolled off of me and hugged me to his chest.

"Don't worry, Billie. Nobody's ever gonna hurt you again," he whispered in my ear.

Only then did I let myself slip into true and safe unconsciousness.

* * *

**The next chapter will explain what decisions were being made while Two-bit was cleaning up Billie. It is going to be an intense chapter. It will also explain why Two-bit was the one washing her and not Sudie.**

**I hope you are enjoying it!**

**Thanks for reading!**

**The Shadowless Girl.**

**P.S. I know nobody could ever replace any member of the gang, But Billie and Sudie are reminders of them. There will be alot more development of Sudie in the next chapter, and you will understand how she is alot like Dally. But a bit more motherly. **


	9. Another Author's Note

**Hey y'all! **

**A reminder!**

**Just waiting 'til I hit 25 reviews 'til I give you the new chapter that I have written!**

**And trust me it's aaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaazzzzzzzziiiiiiiiii nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggg!**

**The Shadowless Girl**


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